Dear Rowley,
You know I’ve always been a terrific fan of Madonna man and boy. But I am most disturbed by pictures coming over the wires for her latest tour. I believe she was in Abu Dhabi or some such when in a fit of exhibitionism and questionable taste, the queen of pop flashed a nipple to the audience. I’m all for the sisters refusing to dance to Father Time’s tune but does anybody really want to see Madonna’s scrawny old tits these days? She’s a magnificent woman and dresses demonically well. But comes a time in every Salome’s life when she can no longer afford to drop the seventh veil.
I’ve realised how hard we’ve all been working on tomorrow’s Savile Row cocktail party at the Burlington Arcade for London Collections: Men. I’ve just sat down with a large Coalport tea cup filled with Better Half’s preferred infusion of Lapsang and English Breakfast tea to watch Deal or No Deal and realise I haven’t made a date with Noel and the Pilgrims for far too long. As you know I’m not a little obsessed by Deal. Whenever anybody asks me for my five year plan, I usually tell them I’m lucky to make it through the night. But my only ambition really is to be a contestant on Deal. Would I gamble? I’m ready for the question Noel.
We’ve just had the retouched version of Guy ‘Dashing Tweeds’ Hills’s cover shot for my new Thames & Hudson book The Perfect Gentleman. I can’t get you a copy quite yet but in its absence have sent you the un-retouched version. My collar needs a bit of attention and I am sure there’s evidence of razor burn on my neck. But it’s a cute cover, no? I know I carped and bitched about it for months but the best shot won in the end. Adore the blue, you?
Now I know it’s like red rag to a bull to write a book called The Perfect Gentleman and pose for the cover shot. But we couldn’t afford a model and I think it’s appropriate with the Anne Boleyn crop: headless. What are we going to do for the launch party in London darling? And do you think we ought to take it out on the road like the last one and launch it in Paris, Toronto and Singapore?
Bumped into a dear friend of yours today at Henry Poole & Co. I was dressing the showroom for tomorrow’s Savile Row Open Day with ledgers pertaining to Emperor Alexander III of Russia, King Edward VII, the Empress Eugenie of the French, Charles Dickens, Buffalo Bill Cody and the Crown Prince of Japan: something for everyone in the international press. Anyway, I digress. In walks Jo Levin, the legendary fashion director of British GQ. We spoke very fondly of you and Jo said how fortunate the world is to have sunbeams like you around however briefly.
‘Gorgeous’ George Garnier agreed to be our official photographer for tomorrows activities and we shot a terrific Savile Row letterbox and sign group portrait of the handsome lads currently serving apprenticeships at all the legit bespoke houses. It is a total winner and I will send you the shot as soon as we have it. If the BFC promises to recreate the image with their British campaign ambassadors tomorrow we’ll have quite a hot shot. Names who have been approached include Jude Law, Benedict Cumberbach and Freddie Flintoff.
Off to Hampton Court Palace tonight to see the legendary Liza with Scott ‘Bespoke Banter’. We’re motoring down with chilled prosecco in the ice box and a hamper full of goodies to picnic before the main event. So excited. Can you take it?